I really didnt deserve this much Grace

Can you imagine being plagued with a disease that would cause you to convulse while you lay powerless and cannot control the outcome of this disease. Imagine just for a moment people looking at you with pitiful stares. Im sure everyone who has ever been afflicted with epilepsy knows what I’m talking about. Ok so Check this out! I was taking drugs to slow my brain from all these electric shocks, these drugs were so strong i would sleep for hours and even days. events like these literally freaked my parents out. So off to the doctor’s office I went. Then he would send me home with a souvenir bag full of uppers. So here Id go no sleep for days on end and then back to sleeping and not to mention whenever(I’m about 10 yrs old at this time) i forgot to take my meds, like any normal boy at my age would, convulsions came trumpeting into my so called life. It was tragic! Looking back at this time I think no little boy should go through this. Then I begin to think about this time and how God’s hand was moving in my life. I remember a story in the new testament where Jesus and his disciples were face to face with a blind man who was blind since birth. the msg says it like this:

Walking down the street, Jesus saw a man blind from birth. His disciples asked, “Rabbi, who sinned: this man or his parents, causing him to be born blind?” 3-5Jesus said, “You’re asking the wrong question. You’re looking for someone to blame. There is no such cause-effect here. Look instead for what God can do. We need to be energetically at work for the One who sent me here, working while the sun shines. john 9:1-3

Wow amazing!! Christ is letting his disciples know a very important attribute of His power and his focus. He is letting them know its about his Glory. This man was born blind to to one day be healed by the King of Glory so that the first thing He saw was the King Himself. Incredible!! I think Christ was saying the true way to look at life and circumstances is seeing Jesus first. Its all about him. One of my favorite Quotes reads like this ” Obstacles are what one sees when you take your eyes off the prize.”

So going back to my story So there I was an eleven year old who had been told by two different doctors that i wasn’t going to outgrow this one as so many other children do and My life would be a slew of convulsions, E.E.G. tests and doctors visits. Then it happened. I didn’t really know God but I knew somehow after praying a simple childhood prayer I felt Him. I felt my body and my brain different, granted I didn’t know God like I know him now. I didn’t know what speaking in tongues was or the definition of words like sanctification or deism or eschatology. i just prayed and Grace came. Simple as that. The time the day came when my medication was due and I got all of them and threw them away. oh yeah there is something to be said about parents who have faith in their son and more importantly their faith in God that they trusted me in my decision. Yet from that day on I never have taken any medication, the doctors couldn’t find out anything and I’m as normal as anyone reading this blog( well then again I’m not that normal but i don’t have epilepsy)